If the pen and the sword are interchangeable in terms of resistance, than I am a knight and the people are my kingdom.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

HALLOWEEN: A chapter 7 bankruptcy nightmare!

I live in a neighborhood with 20,000 kids.

Which means I obviously had to liquidate all my assets and file a chapter 7 bankruptcy (considered a chapter 11 but decided against it) to afford all that candy.

They kicked me out of my house, and out of the neighborhood, so now I'm stuck with nothing but 400 bags of candy to my name. (And my computer and anything else I would need to make this logically possible.)

I built a shelter, using the hard chewy candy like Sugar Daddys and Snickers as the roof, and built my bed out of 3 Musketeers, and built the walls with Twix. (To reader who just asked himself, "but how is he on the internet right now???" My ethernet is Twizzlers, you bastard.)

Which just goes to show that in life, you may encounter many scenarios that ask of you to become a martyr, and you are allowed to choose which one to accept.

I chose a horrible situation to prove myself a selfless person.

Some situations can be ignored for the greater good.

There is only gray area in life, because every good decision will affect someone negatively and every bad decision will affect someone positively.

When in doubt, remember to question yourself- like, "If I buy enough candy for just half the kids, obviously the skinny kids will get it all, while the fat kids lumber behind slowly, and those fatties really dont even need the candy, so everyone wins- except the fatties."

Wish I had done that. Because my roof is melting.


30 comments:

  1. Lol nice, I love halloween candy - so cheap and unhealthy.
    good advice though ;)

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  2. Lol funny story man! mmmm candy :D

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  3. I wish I live in your neighbourhood ^_^

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  4. I got a good laugh out of this one!

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  5. hahahaaha fattys just gettin fatter

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  6. dude. I think i have a cavity just reading that. following and supporting

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  7. You can come liver under my roof, as long as you provide candy.

    I wish the UK did trick or treating :(

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  8. LOL! I thought you were actually serious... you're not right? LOL

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  9. wow big neighborhood. happy halloween.

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  10. hahah save money by avoiding fatties..

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  11. Oh god, I want a bed made of three musketeers.

    The men or the candy. Either way, really.

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  12. That's the way it is all the time, man. Everyone wins, except the fatties.

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  13. I would've made my bed out of gummie bears

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